The Next Step..

On Monday morning, I started the next step in this journey of ours. At 10am I had an appointment in Ottawa at the Ottawa Fertility Center.

I'm not sure I can tell you exactly how I'm felt about this. A huge part of me was feeling happy, and singing praise; after 5 years we may finally get some answers. We had been praying for that day for so long. Another part of me was extremely nervous, anxious, and scared. What if the answers are worse than we expect? What if there are no answers? I'm not sure how we would handle that..

With my stomach in knots, I walked into the building not knowing what to expect. I didn't wait long before I was called in by who I thought was a nurse - My heart filled with sheer joy when she introduced herself as my doctor! These past weeks I just expected that my doctor would be a male, never did it even cross my mind to expect a female. I am so extremely pleased with her! She was wonderful, caring, and very thorough.

After answering an hours worth of questions, I was taken in for an examination, which included various uncomfortable procedures - I won't bother with the TMI on those! I will however tell you that one was so painful, that it literally left me sick to my stomach, and almost threw up on the spot. During my examination, Dr. K determined what I had already expected, and noticed an ovarian cyst on my right ovary. This will be verified & discussed at my next appointment when I have an ultrasound.

After my examination, I was sent to her assistant to go over the next steps. I can only think of one word to describe it; Overwhelming.

Over the next couple months, I have several tests that I need to complete. Some of them can be done whenever, and others need to be on specific days according my cycle. For instance, on the first day of my cycle, I have to call my doctors office, let them know, and schedule 2 ultrasounds. One is just a basic ultrasound, and the other won't be quite as simple. I'm actually dreading the second one entirely. I'm required to take antibiotics before hand, and was forewarned to take Advil beforehand to help with the pain involved.. On the 3rd day, I have to go in for blood work, and then back for more on the 21st day. Amidst all this, I have several other blood tests that also need to be taken care of, they just aren't cycle sensitive. There are a few other things I know I need to do, I just can't think of what they are, off the top of my head. Oye.

If anything, from all of this, I would at least like to know why my body hasn't been able to carry my precious angels. Only God knows whether or not we'll have another child. We don't plan on undergoing any extensive fertility treatments in order to become pregnant again, so I can tell you that we're praying hard for a simple fix (if there is such a thing..). Ah, here's to hoping!